Would You Consider This a Good Marriage?

[wayne1218]

Money & America. That was her dream.

[musclemann]

I asked this question as an aside in another forum, and thought it might make a good thought provoking thread.
I would like anyone who is interested in responding to be openminded in one way or the other because some of what is considered here applies to my current situation(not the sincerity part for sure).
I realize also that many might be bored with the topic and/or have no interest in it for some any reason; if that is true, fine, just go check out some other thread.
For those who are interested, here is the question as posed yesterday and rewritten a little today:

Consider this:
I, an older guy, who is pretty well off financially speaking, sought a younger wife five years ago and went to another country(in my case Colombia) to seek a great wife reason rather than in the US for a variety of reasons-that is not the issue.
Also lets assume I made a wrong assumption, and the woman I ended up marrying really wasn't sincere as I believe her to be, and the monetary part played at least a part in her marrying me.
Now lets assume for the rest of my life she treats me like a king and as loving, caring, etc. as possible.
Lets say that I die when I am 90, meaning that I would have been married to her for 28 years(we have been married for 3 years and I am 65-do the math).
Now the question is would you say that this marriage was a good marriage, bad marriage, successful marriage, etc. or somewhere in between because we were happy together for 28 years even though part of her motives were monetary?(knowing she would inherit some money after I die-for the record my wife is 25 years younger than I am)?
You can give reasons if you like.
Obviously there are no right or wrong answers here-just something for you guys to think about.

Savage if she was there for you the majority of the time you needed her, took care of her duties as a woman, wasnt belligerent, didnt question things you asked her to do, and basically wasnt a bitch, I would have no problem with this situation and leaving her something.

Put it this way, you can always go and find an american broad to marry and put up with her shit for your golden years and leave her everything.......................

[BigWeiner]

I think just the fact alone that somewhere inside you feels the need to ask these types of questions to a gambling forum tells me something might not be too pure about your relationship.

If you had a bunch of responses saying "this is still a great marriage" would you feel better about your situation?

Obviously you aren't just "curious", this must apply to how you are feeling, and to answer your question I think this marriage is blah. Worrying about whether you were married for money sucks, but if it's reality get with the program and live it up while you're here and let whoever gets your money worry about that after you're gone.

Your are dead on. He isn't happy in his marriage, or better stated, he doesn't know what happiness is. Your "wife" didn't marry you because she loved you. Can she learn to love you? Possibly, but more than likely she'll just deal with you.

[BigWeiner]

What the hell is this by the way
"Now lets assume for the rest of my life she treats me like a king and as loving, caring, etc. as possible."
Is she a slave?

[savage1]

I think just the fact alone that somewhere inside you feels the need to ask these types of questions to a gambling forum tells me something might not be too pure about your relationship.

If you had a bunch of responses saying "this is still a great marriage" would you feel better about your situation?

Obviously you aren't just "curious", this must apply to how you are feeling, and to answer your question I think this marriage is blah. Worrying about whether you were married for money sucks, but if it's reality get with the program and live it up while you're here and let whoever gets your money worry about that after you're gone.

al
Absolutely incorrect-my wife is a devout Evangelical Christian-nothing more needs to be said re: how she regards marriage and her husband.

[savage1]

Your are dead on. He isn't happy in his marriage, or better stated, he doesn't know what happiness is. Your "wife" didn't marry you because she loved you. Can she learn to love you? Possibly, but more than likely she'll just deal with you.

In all due respect you are also 100% and making assumptions.
Study the Latin culture and how hey regard marriage and then study what being a devout Evangelical Christian means.
If you did this and in addition met some Colombian women especially, you might feel differently.
I was actually told by a very intelligent cultured Peruvian women with whom I used to work and a good friend for many years.
She is in fact one of the ones who suggested that I seek a Colombian lady rather than a Peruvian one because of her knowledge about their perspective of life, marriage, how they treat their husbands.
I could never be happier with my wife and marriage;I honestly believe this is the lady God wanted me to marry.

[savage1]

What the hell is this by the way
"Now lets assume for the rest of my life she treats me like a king and as loving, caring, etc. as possible."
Is she a slave?

You are missing the point here;read my previous posts and my opening question more carefully.

[BigWeiner]

I realize you think of marriage as two people that are forced to live together and pretending to like each other. One person can't find someone to actually marry them for the right reasons, the other person does it because they don't wanna be poor and hungry. In my opinion that's wrong, and there's no way you can change my mind. Look, I could study what Charlie Manson was teaching, but I'll pass. Just like I'll pass on studying about people marrying for the wrong reasons.

[wayne1218]

You are missing the point here;read my previous posts and my opening question more carefully.

You shouldn't tell him to read it again. You should explain it better.


Signed,

savage

[savage1]

Your are dead on. He isn't happy in his marriage, or better stated, he doesn't know what happiness is. Your "wife" didn't marry you because she loved you. Can she learn to love you? Possibly, but more than likely she'll just deal with you.

In terms of what I said in my initial post and regarding what I said in response in regard to your other post, please tell me specifically what led to your conclusions here?
How can you possibly conclude based on your never having met her and what I just stated about her culture and religion and how both think of marriage and men, that my wife didn't marry me because she loved me but for other reasons?
I am asking this question in all sincerity? I love to hear other polite points of view, and that is why I started this topic in the first place.

[savage1]

You shouldn't tell him to read it again. You should explain it better.


Signed,

savage

Not as good as your other one about the going to Argentina to post a GOY.

[insidethe8thpol]

You are missing the point here;read my previous posts and my opening question more carefully.

Why is it that everytime someone posts their thoughts/perspectives on this 'they are always missing the point' according to you??

Why dont you give all of us the answer you are looking for and we will guess the question ala The Great Carnac and Ed McMahon and save us the trouble of deciphering your 60 page codes that only mutes and Indian tribesmen can solve

[insidethe8thpol]

al
Absolutely incorrect-my wife is a devout Evangelical Christian-nothing more needs to be said re: how she regards marriage and her husband.

How much more would have to be said if she was Jewish? Catholic? Romainian? Half frog Half lizard? 3/4 muskrat 1/4 latino?

[wayne1218]

I love to hear other polite points of view,

No you don't. You like to disagree with every one of them and tell them they are wrong or missing the point. Maybe they made their point and YOU missed it?

[savage1]

Why is it that everytime someone posts their thoughts/perspectives on this 'they are always missing the point' according to you??

Why dont you give all of us the answer you are looking for and we will guess the question ala The Great Carnac and Ed McMahon and save us the trouble of deciphering your 60 page codes that only mutes and Indian tribesmen can solve

When the focus of emphasis changes from that which I intended, I feel that I need to point it out.
In the post to which BW made, he alluded to the word "slave"-this has nothing to do with slavery and has nothing to do with what was stated in my original post.
In looking back at what I originally posted, I made no reference to the fact that Rosa, the lady I married, is a devout Evangelical Christian, and I knew that before I married her.
Thus, the question I asked without the allusion to religion is not a real fair one for anyone to answer in the way in which it was posed regarding the opinion of my marriage;this is because the mindset of a true Evangelical Christian in marrying someone has ZERO to do with money.
I probably should have specified in my original thread and premise that for the sake of example lets assume that my wife was not the religious person I knew her to be and then went in with on with the question.
I sure hope above makes sense.