Originally posted by jcindaville
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Urgent Please Read/respond!!!! Part 2
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Some oldies but goodies
The wife's back on the warpath again. Last night she said she wanted to make a sex movie, and all I did was suggest we should hold auditions for her part.
My sister-in-law sat on my glasses and broke them. It was my own fault. I should have taken them off.
I spent a couple of hours defrosting the fridge last night, or "foreplay" as she likes to call it.
After both suffering from depression for a while, the wife and I were going to commit suicide yesterday. But strangely enough, once she killed herself, I started to feel a lot better. So I thought, screw it, I'll soldier on!
The other night, my wife asked me how many women I'd slept with. I told her, "Only you. All the others kept me awake all night!"
My wife packed my bags and said "GET OUT!!!". As I walked out the front door, she screamed, "I wish you a slow and painful death, you bastard!"
"Oh," I replied, "so now you want me to stay!"
I've just installed strobe lights in the bedroom. It makes the wife look like she's moving during sex.
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Originally posted by garth View PostMorning everyone. Going to OU/Tulsa 11:00 game tomorrow. My sons got me a ticket for my birthday. It was a thoughtful gift and it will be good to see my youngest who's coming up from Austin. Unfortunately, they expect me to be in Norman at 8:30 in the a.m. ready to tailgate. I guess I should probably not be at the blackjack table until 2 a.m. as is customary on any given Friday evening.
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Originally posted by vols fan View Post7:15 tee time in the morning, Colby has a game at noon,vols play at 3:30 so good chance I'm going to be tired and drunk come tomorrow night.2013 NCAA POD Record
8-3ATS +3.80 units
2013 NFL POD Record
1-2 ATS -4.50 units
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Originally posted by ToDaClub View PostCan you get a Harvard grad for 100K???Questions, comments, complaints:
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Originally posted by vols fan View PostNo cause I will be watching it. Only way you can text me is if Tennessee AND the over both hit. Otherwise we might be breaking up again!!!Questions, comments, complaints:
[email protected]
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Originally posted by ToDaClub View PostThe wife's back on the warpath again. Last night she said she wanted to make a sex movie, and all I did was suggest we should hold auditions for her part.
My sister-in-law sat on my glasses and broke them. It was my own fault. I should have taken them off.
I spent a couple of hours defrosting the fridge last night, or "foreplay" as she likes to call it.
After both suffering from depression for a while, the wife and I were going to commit suicide yesterday. But strangely enough, once she killed herself, I started to feel a lot better. So I thought, screw it, I'll soldier on!
The other night, my wife asked me how many women I'd slept with. I told her, "Only you. All the others kept me awake all night!"
My wife packed my bags and said "GET OUT!!!". As I walked out the front door, she screamed, "I wish you a slow and painful death, you bastard!"
"Oh," I replied, "so now you want me to stay!"
I've just installed strobe lights in the bedroom. It makes the wife look like she's moving during sex.
Sister in lawQuestions, comments, complaints:
[email protected]
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Originally posted by vols fan View PostNo cause I will be watching it. Only way you can text me is if Tennessee AND the over both hit. Otherwise we might be breaking up again!!!Originally posted by jcindaville View PostI foresee a divorce happening
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Originally posted by ToDaClub View PostMental note, turn off cell phone during Tenn, Oregon game
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Originally posted by vols fan View PostBut then I miss my kids calling asking what the score is and who is winning. Oh if it was my weekend with them I would shut that fucker off till Monday. Unless Vols win and hell y'all might be shutting your phones off cause of me
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