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Bettorschat Mad LIbs #3: BC In Space

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  • #16
    These where great guys!!! LMBO!!!

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    • #17
      Blackbeard’s Mad Lib 3

      It was the year 2048 , WHEN JOSE MESA FINALLY GOT 2 SAVES IN A ROW, the starship USS POOK YOCK had just telported their landing party back to the ship after a long stay on planet GLENDA. SPARK took off his space MAKE – UP and signaled the KAPTAIN that they could break WIND. SPARK WAS CONSTIPATED AS USUAL. Captain KARL CUT LOOSE THIS TREMENDOUS FOT and turned to his navigator MOONDOG , and told him to set a course for THE NEAREST PORTO - POTTY , when his communications officer MIKE 1 said they were being hailed by an enemy GAS ATTACK. The weapons officer KEAWE who was half man, half TUNA ON RYE, turned the weapons array & guidance systems to FEND OFF ANY UNPLEASANT ODOR EMITTED BY KARL’S MUSICAL CRACK.

      Suddenly off the port side of the ship, space began to warp and a tear in space opened up, a RESULT OF THE KAPTAIN’S BAD BURRITO NO DOUBT, LOVEDOC emerged and began TO POO - POO on the ship. The Captain signaled for red ROSES … HIS FAVORITE …. and ordered all hands to GROPE HIS PISS PUMP, and told the crew to put on their space K-Y JELLY. Time began to FLY as the ship was drawn into the rip in space. The captain shouted “ HEY BIG MIKE …. WANNA JOIN IN " ??? but his words WERE IGNORED (AS MIKE WAS TAKING HIS DAILY ENEMA ) as the ship got closer to the hole. The crew blacked out and the ship vanished into the hole followed by a FARTING sound, and a GROUP CRAP, and then nothingness.

      The ship emerged on the other side of the galaxy orbiting the STINKY nebula. The captain began to awake and called the medical center on the ships CELL PHONE WHICH R WALL WALLY BOOSTED FROM SOME UKRANIAN HOOKER NAMED OLGA. Doctor SPARK was wrapping a MEAT BALL HERO FOR THE ROAD and nurse MARTINA MARTY MART was applying a funny looking ointment to HIS NUT SACK. The infirmary was overloaded with FLATULENCE and some of the crew had space MASKS ON. The doctor told the captain that he was going to have to KNOCK OFF THE MEXICAN FOOD and got back to HIS DOUBLE ORDER OF BAKED CLAMS .

      Outside the ship, the nebula began to coalesce and take the shape of LSU JIMMY’S YAM BAG. A booming voice could be heard throughout the ship. The crew had to PRESS COVERBOY’S WORLD FAMOUS VEAL CUTLETS over their ears to keep from going OVER TO BLACK BEARD’S BERTH TO GIVE HIM A BONE JOB . That’s no nebula shouted SAVAGE , that’s a 5 MINUTE VOICE MESSAGE from THAT FUCKING ASS CLOWN PHIL STEELE. The captain shouted “Open THE HATCH, I WANT GLENDA’S SNATCH” but that had no affect. He shouted to the helmsman to prepare for lightspeed and turn on the space WHATCHAMACALLIT, but the helm was not responding. Suddenly the BIG WEINER opened its mouth and YAKKED ALL OVER the ship.

      The cyborg science officer MAADDDOG told the captain that they only had one chance to save the ship. He began OILING KARL’S BALLS and after a minute of GIGGLING he pulled the positron cable out of THAT FINE ASS and inserted it into COVERBOY’S MOUTH. The lights on the bridge dimmed and then the creature began to ROCK & ROLL . The ship shook violently as the creature STRAPPED ON COVERBOY’S GUITAR AND WENT INTO A RIFF FROM HENDRIX’ “HEAR MY TRAIN A COMING “ . After a minute the cyborg removed the PLUG FROM THE AMP and the creature screamed and SMASHED THE GUITAR OVER THE CYBORG’S FUCKING HEAD. The ensuing explosion forced the ship through a new tear in space and they tumbled to a stop near TACO BELL BECAUSE KARL HAD THE URGE TO TOSS DOWN 5 or 6 MORE BURRITOS….. LIKE HE WASN’T GASSY ENOUGH …. PPPPP UUUUU !!!!!

      The engines were up and running again and the KAPTAIN was nowhere to be seen. In fact the other PAIN IN THE ASS … SPARK ….. was gone and everything was FRESH SMELLING ONCE AGAIN . "All that for nothing" said the MAADDDOG .. I MESSAGED KARL’S KILL-YOONS FOR AN HOUR AND STILL HE WOULDN’T GIVE IT UP “. I wouldn’t REPEAT WHAT the captain said, we did get to PHONEPOLE’S and GANG BANGED THAT CREATURE 7 DIFFERENT WAYS FROM SUNDAY , that’s always good, and we are alive, which is quite RIDICULOUS . I would say it was a GASEOUS experience and we should THANK GOD that we have 50% OF OUR SENSE OF SMELL REMAINING . Set a course for TOKYO , I think we all need a JAP HOE and to remember that space TRAVEL is our TICKET OUT OF THE SLUMS and never forget TO BRING ENOUGH UNDERWEARS.

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      • #18
        Coverboy, I can't stop laughing!!

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        • #19
          Neil

          I'm in tears. I was laughing so hard, it felt like I couldn't breath for 5 minutes. Too many funny lines in this one to list.

          This week's Mad Lib was set up perfectly for the ole Kapt.
          "Calling an illegal alien an 'undocumented immigrant'
          is like calling a drug dealer an 'unlicensed pharmacist'"

          Comment


          • #20
            Originally posted by CoverBoy
            Me too ... us artists are tempermental ... 95% temper and 5% mental.
            Knuck Knuck Knuck

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            • #21
              It was the year 1, the starship USS Pole Smoker, had just telported their landing party back to the ship after a long stay on planet Ork. RJeremy took off his space strap-on and signaled Big Mike that they could break out some KY. Captain KMann turned to his navigator Coverboy, and told him to set a course for a non-interleague planet, when his communications officer Memphis Mafia said they were being hailed by an enemy Warlord. The weapons officer Uncle Mo who was half man, half another man that works with him in accounting, turned the weapons array & guidance systems over to Spark so that he could ban some more shit.

              Suddenly off the port side of the ship, space began to warp and a tear in space opened up, a hairy dwarf emerged and began licking the ship. The Captain signaled for a blowjob and ordered all whores to line up and told the crew to put on their space togas. Time began to go in reverse as the ship was drawn into the rip in space. The captain shouted "Damn it....NO TEETH" but his words went unheard as the ship got closer to the hole. The crew blacked out and the ship vanished into the hole followed by a "UHHHH" sound, and a wad of jizz, and than nothingness.

              The ship emerged on the other side of the galaxy orbiting the Vegas nebula. The captain began to awake and called the medical center in the ships dungeon. Doctor Hook was rapping a Snoop Dogg song and nurse 10Dime was applying a funny looking ointment to his hairy marble sack. The infirmary was overloaded with hookers and some of the crew had space AIDS. The doctor told the captain that he was going to have to amputate his gang-green penis before it spread to the rest of the crew.

              Outside the ship, the nebula began to coalesce and take the shape of Ty Gaston. A booming voice could be heard throughout the ship. The crew had to put their herpes-infected hands over their ears to keep from going nuts with all the bullshit that was spewing. That’s no nebula shouted BHS, that’s a fat fucking Ty Gaston from the Scamdicapper Galaxy! The captain shouted “open your fucking eyes” but that had no affect. He shouted to the helmsman to prepare for lightspeed and turn on the space burner, but the helm was not responding. Suddenly Ty Gaston opened his gigantic mouth and puked all over the ship.

              The cyborg science officer, EZ, told the captain that they only had one chance to save the ship. He began convulsing and after a minute of speaking in tongues he pulled his shriveled pecker out of Wayne's mouth and inserted it into Ty Gaston's gigantic ass. The lights on the bridge dimmed and then the creature began to vibrate and gyrate. The ship shook violently as the creature started to orgasm. After a minute the cyborg removed his now erect schlong and the creature screamed and wanted more. The ensuing explosion forced the ship through a new tear in space and they tumbled to a stop near Spark's trailer.

              The engines were up and running again and Ty was nowhere to be seen. In fact the AIDS epidemic was gone and everything was back to normal. "All that for nothing" said Love Doc. I wouldn’t say that the captains said, I did get many blowjobs and EZ got to bang that creature, that’s always good, and we are alive, which is quite refreshing. I would say it was a fucked-up experience and we should be grateful that we have Chuck's PODs. Set a course for the Bunny Ranch, I think we all need some furry monkey and remember that space sexcapades are our secret and never forget to bring enough whores with you.

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              • #22
                Originally posted by Hoosier Daddy
                Set a course for the Bunny Ranch, I think we all need some furry monkey and remember that space sexcapades are our secret and never forget to bring enough whores with you.
                That's what I'm Talkin' about. The Bunny Ranch Rocks!!!
                "Calling an illegal alien an 'undocumented immigrant'
                is like calling a drug dealer an 'unlicensed pharmacist'"

                Comment


                • #23
                  Hoosier

                  "The weapons officer Uncle Mo who was half man, half another man that works with him in accounting "
                  ^
                  ^
                  ^
                  ^
                  THAT'S VERY FUNNY !!! TYPICAL OF A NEW YORK SENSE OF HUMOR.


                  LMAO @ "Outside the ship, the nebula began to coalesce and take the shape of Ty Gaston"


                  Well Done Buddy

                  -cb

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                  • #24
                    Kaptains Version

                    Originally posted by blackbeard
                    Fill in the blanks:

                    It was the year 2049, the starship USSAssWipe, had just telported their landing party back to the ship after a long stay on planet Vagina. RJ took off his space"Man Purse" and signaled the Go-ahead "Penis In Hand" that they could break orbit. Captain Kmann turned to his navigator and told him to set a course for Anals-okay , when his communications officer the Siamese Twins UncleMo/Hoss said they were being hailed by an enemy gigantic condom. The weapons officer who was half man, halfass fvkng crazy---he was a cajun, turned the weapons array & guidance systems towards the Giant Condom.

                    Suddenly off the port side of the ship, space began to warp and a tear in space opened up, a huge Dildo emerged and began rubbing itself on the ship. The Captain signaled for red [COLOR=Red]head of the pinusalert and ordered all hands to start stroking that Giant Dildo and told the crew to put on their spacepurses like RJ wears, so they could confuse the Giant Dildo. Time began to not mean a fvkng thing, the crew knew they were in trouble, as the ship was drawn into the rip in space. The captain shouted "take off those damn RJ purses, and fight like fvkng men...You asses act like you have never seen a big Dick before. but his words fell on deaf ears as he realized he did indeed have a faggot crew, as the ship got closer to the hole. The crew blacked out and the ship vanished into the hole followed by a 5 gallons of paint (without the can) hitting the floor sound , and a monsterous sigh of relief sound, and than nothingness.

                    The ship emerged on the other side of the galaxy orbiting the white powdery, heavily sedating nebula. The captain began to awake and called the medical center on the ships emergency room. Doctor LoveDoc was wrapping a $20.00 off coupon on 10Dimes ass and nurse Tigger was applying a funny looking ointment to LSU Fans' Balls...appeared he had some severe strawberry abrasions---He's had em before... The infirmary was overloaded with Vaseline and some of the crew had spaceexhaustion and muscle cramps---mostly to their forearms. The doctor told the captain that he was going to have to throw away all the porn movies and magazines and got back to his task of looking at 10Dimes ass again.

                    Outside the ship, the nebula began to coalesce and take the shape of a cyclops one eyed asshole. A booming voice could be heard throughout the ship. The crew had to try and stop WayneChungs rambling on and cover their ears to keep from going even more crazy...They had heard all that before. That’s no nebula shouted CoverBoy, that’s a gigantic picture of Spark naked from his 1944 Graduation party. The captain shouted “open all toilet facility Ports” but that had no affect. He shouted to the helmsman to prepare for lightspeed and turn on the spaceFlatulator, but the helm was not responding. Suddenly the giant Dildoopened its mouth and started sucking onthe ship.

                    The cyborg science officerRWALL told the captain that they only had one chance to save the ship. He began checking out the crews asses and after a minute of sniffing em over he pulled the positron cable out of Montesass and inserted it into Waynes. The lights on the bridge dimmed and then the creature began tolose his erection and become flacid. The ship shook violently as the creature slapped his dick numerous times against it---trying to get another erection. After a minute the cyborg removed theover used condom and the creature screamed andstarted cryingand cutting farts. The ensuing explosion forced the ship through a new tear in space and they tumbled to a stop nearTransvestite.

                    The engines were up and running again and the picture of Spark Naked was nowhere to be seen. In fact the othermirage was gone and everything was back to normal. "All that for nothing" said theSiames Twins UncleMo and Hoss. I wouldn’t say that the captains said, we did get tosee some strange things and slow down that creature, that’s always good, and we are alive, which is quite remarkable. I would say it was anightmarishexperience and we should be of little concern that we have these bad dreams and nightmares while in outer space. Set a course forBettorsChat, I think we all need a step back into reality and to remember that spacetravel is our second choice of enjoyment and never forget all our good friends and the enjoyment we have at Bettors Chat....I tell ya Krew, "Theres no place like home"

                    From the Kaptain


                    Don't make me go Cajun on your Ass!

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                    • #25
                      Kaptain

                      Originally posted by kmann
                      From the Kaptain


                      "That’s no nebula shouted CoverBoy, that’s a gigantic picture of Spark naked from his 1944 Graduation party." ROFLMAO

                      "The captain shouted "take off those damn RJ purses, and fight like fvkng men."

                      Awesome Kapt. I just ruined another pair of underware.
                      "Calling an illegal alien an 'undocumented immigrant'
                      is like calling a drug dealer an 'unlicensed pharmacist'"

                      Comment


                      • #26
                        Very Good Kapt ... hahaha

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                        • #27
                          great 1 Kap, thanks for forgetting to get me back hahahahaha
                          Lord Knows I'm A Voodoo Child




                          My record Click Here

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                          • #28
                            beard

                            Originally posted by blackbeard
                            great 1 Kap, thanks for forgetting to get me back hahahahaha
                            Theres plenty of time for that my man....It's inevitable---kapt


                            Don't make me go Cajun on your Ass!

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