Hello Everyone

[Kaptain]

GoldVike

Well put---only some one who was there could have written that with the Heart you put in it....He indeed was an "inspiration".....Thanks for sharing that with us...as always---the Kapt

[RJeremy]

GV,

amazing story. Thanks so much for sharing!

[moondog22]

Thanks for your heart felt story GoldVike

[knowlez]

Guys you are amazing. Goldvike I too grew up on the farm so I really appreciate what you had to say. I just got back from the cemetery. I talked to my Dad and told him Happy Birthday as it would have been his 70th Birthday I took a balloon and i wrote him a long letter as I stood there and rembered all the good times we shared. I read my letter out loud and told him I loved him. I really got the sensation my old man was right there with me. My dad retired off the railroad a few years back and he earned every dollar he ever made. He was laid to rest on top a big hill in Melrose Iowa overlooking the city. The town now has maybe a hundred people left but it has plenty of pride. AS I left the cemetery and headed back into town I was stopped bye a train the tracks run right through the city as I sat there watching the coal cars go bye when i seen Your Old Man wrote in bright letters as the last car went bye. I cried all the way back to town as I just wanted to jump on the train and sail away with him. Guys Thanks for everything as I just cant seem to let go apart of seemed to go away the day I lost my DAD.

[Spark]

Thats because you are not ready to let go my friend ... You will in time ... I remember one of the toughest things for me was going to the cemetery for the first time after my mom past .. It took me 15min to get out of the car ...

You will feel stronger as the time goes by ... we just want you to know that you are not alone and we are here ... if you have anyone's addy from here I am sure they would call and talk to you ... You hang in there now and God Bless .. Be strong buddy!!! You are loved

[ChuckLazar]

Sorry to hear about your Dad!!
I live next door to my parents and work with my dad when I get layed off from my union job.
We golf together at least 2 days a week. He's a young 69 and stays in shape and I never think about losing him. But I know someday it's going to happen.
Always kept him in your thoughts and I know he will be always be there for you.

God Bless!!! I've always enjoyed your comments!

[zeib10]

Knowlez,

I just read this post tonight and my prayers go out to you and your family. As many members here know, I lost my dad 12/6/04, he was 54. Hardest thing that I ever had to do was see him die in his hospital bed. He died of a failed bone marrow transplant (cancer).

Nothing anyone says will make it feel much better but it helps. I still talk to my dad everyday an reflect on the good times we had. There were many missed oppurtunities but who actually thinks about death? Hell, in the last interview with the doctor, my dad asked if he was allowed to go to the Eagles game (He was allowed although my mom was not a fan because he had no immune system with the treatment he was on before the actual transplant.) We had a blast!!

It will get better as time goes on.

Everything does happen for a reason (I truly believe that my dad was in more pain than he ever let on).

He had 69 great years and may be in a better place now.

Again, it is not easy at all but remember, what would your father want? Most likely not to mourn but to remember and move forward.

Good luck, God Bless and let me know if I can help in anyway.

[bigjimt]

Knowlez

I don't know what to say. I have 3 more days experience in this area than you do, as I lost my own Dad (age 64) on June 20. He had been battling Cancer for the passed 5 years and passed away from a massive heart attack in the recovery room after his 8th surgery.

(I tried 3 seperate times over a 45 minute period to sum up either something witty or prophetic or even merely relevant... just know there is someone out there going through the same thing... and remember no matter what, we are truly never alone).

Stay strong man.

[Art Vandelay]

Knowlez,

Ever since I read your post I was especially moved by your statement about giving up a year of your life for just a single day with your father. My parents are both in their late 70's and some day I will be feeling their loss as well. If that statement has affected others like it has me, our relationships with our parents will be more enriching and meaningful thanks to your heartfelt post. Thank you.
Things will get better. It's nice to have the family of guys here at BC in your corner. Take care and God Bless.

[Spark]

knowlez

How are you buddy???

[Spark]

Knowlez

I don't know what to say. I have 3 more days experience in this area than you do, as I lost my own Dad (age 64) on June 20. He had been battling Cancer for the passed 5 years and passed away from a massive heart attack in the recovery room after his 8th surgery.

(I tried 3 seperate times over a 45 minute period to sum up either something witty or prophetic or even merely relevant... just know there is someone out there going through the same thing... and remember no matter what, we are truly never alone).

Stay strong man.

Jim, I am so sorry to hear this ... My condolences to you and your family ... Stay strong!

[thesandman]

Knowlez and JimT. I'm sorry I didn't see this thread sooner but I rarely go into this forum. Something made me go there tonight and maybe that something was so I could tell you that as hard as things seem now, as the days go on you will still love your dads as much, but the times you grieve, will slowly happen less often. You will never get totally over losing your dads or for that matter any close relative, but as others have said, you life will go on. Your fathers will be proudly looking down on you and taking in all your accompishments, so don't let them down. It's OK to grieve, in fact something is wrong with anyone who dosen't grieve, but try not to let your loss take over your life entirely.

I know first hand how you fee,l losing my Mom when she was only 63 to lung cancer, even thought she never smoked a day in her life. My dad was 76 when I lost him to cancer and I lost my wife when she was only 51, to pancreatic cancer.

Like most of us here, I was close to my dad. It's a guy thing. I would guess more of us were closer to our dads than our moms. Looking back when my Mom died, I grieved just as much, but I didn't miss her as much as I did my dad. When my wife died, both my daughter took it very hard, because most girls are closest to their moms.

Knowlez and JimT. I know how bad you feel right this minute but in between grieving, try to do something nice for Knowlez and JimT. It's been 9 years since my wife died, 19 years since I lost my dad and 10 years more when I lost my Mom. Still after all that time, it does help to write about them. If either of you ever want to just talk, ask Monte for my email address. And don't underestimate, if there is one near where you live, what a support group for those like yourselves can do for you. This may sound trite, but it's true, misery does like company.

[VickieD]

Knowlez,

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

Vickie

[knowlez]

BigjimT I am so sorry to here of your loss. All I know right now is Cancer is a terrible disease that has struck so many of us here in our own little family. It doesent matter if your One or a hundred and one it can strike at any time. It literally has knocked me down but Iam going to fight back against this deadly disease. I will attend a cancer walk for those who have lost loved ones due to this terrible disease. Iam going to get involved in a hospice house and try to help people who are going thru this because no one should go thru this alone I found this out and it has made me sick. I love all you guys and girls here just as you were my own Brother Sisters. Thanks for all you have done it has helped me greatly. I think of my old man and i think this is what he would want me to do.

[savage1]

Knowlez-I am so sorry for your loss. My dad died 2 years ago at 90;yes he was old, yes,but I still miss him greatly.
Hang in there;time is the great healer and of course have faith!