Urgent Please Read/respond!!!! Part 2

[10DimeBry]

Glad its friday.


End of summer/travers party aty house tomorrow

[ToDaClub]

Good to see BBD post

Cubs lose in extra innings

Yesterday was one of my better Thursdays in a while.

what's everyone got planned?

I've got two rooms left to put in baseboard and I will finally finish my "winter" building project. Then Sunday I'm off to the twin cities for a couple days. JC when is your wife coming???? I'm staying right by Best Buy headquarters.

[baseballdave]

Southern cops have a way with words! These are actual comments made by South Carolina Troopers that were
taken off their car videos:


1. "You know, stop lights don't come any redder than the one you
just went through."

2. "Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll
stretch after you wear them a while."

3. "If you take your hands off the car, I'll make your birth
certificate a worthless document."

4. "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."

5. "Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? Because that's the
speed of the bullet that'll be chasing you." (LOVE IT)

6. "You don't know how fast you were going? I guess that means I can
write anything I want to on the ticket, huh?"

7. "Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't
think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I'm the shift supervisor?"

8. "Warning! You want a warning? O.K, I'm warning you not to do that
again or I'll give you another ticket."

9. "The answer to this last question will determine whether you are
drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?"

10. "Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you
go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy and corn dogs and step in monkey
poop."

11. "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a
toaster oven."

12. "In God we trust; all others we run through NCIC." ( National
Crime Information Center )

13. "Just how big were those 'two beers' you say you had?"

14. "No sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to, but now we're
allowed to write as many tickets as we can."

15. "I'm glad to hear that the Chief (of Police) is a personal
friend of yours. So you know someone who can post your bail."

AND THE WINNER IS....

16. "You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? You're right, we
don't. Sign here."

[baseballdave]

SOCIALLY UNEXCEPTABLE COMMENTS


I saw a poor old lady fall over today on the ice!! At least
I presume she was poor - she only had $1.20 in her purse.






My girlfriend thinks that I'm a stalker. Well, she's
not exactly my girlfriend yet.



A wife says to her husband you're always pushing me
around and talking behind my back. He says what do you
expect? You're in a wheel chair.


I was explaining to my wife last night that when
you die you get reincarnated but must come back as a
different creature. She said she would like to come back as
a cow. I said, "You're obviously not listening".



The wife has been missing a week now. Police said to prepare
for the worst. So, I have been to the thrift shop to get all
of her clothes back.



At the Senior Citizens Center they had a contest the other
day. I lost by one point: The question was: Where do women
mostly have curly hair? Apparently the correct answer was
Africa !!!



One of the other questions that I missed was to name one
thing commonly found in cells. It appears that Mexicans is
not the correct answer either.



There's a new Muslim clothing shop opened in our
shopping center, but I've been banned from it after
asking to look at some of the new bomber jackets.



You can say lots of bad things about pedophiles but at least
they drive slowly past schools.





Just put a deposit down on a brand new Porsche and mentioned
it on Facebook. I said, "I can't wait for the new
911 to arrive!" Next thing I know 4,000 dumbass Muslims
had added me as a friend!!




The Red Cross had just knocked at our door and asked if we
could help towards the floods in Pakistan . I said we would
love to, but our garden hose only reaches the driveway.

[jcindaville]

One week from tonight boys it all starts

Your coming out party?

[kbsooner21]

One week from tonight boys it all starts

And we got saturday night at the Bullring to get us there

[vols fan]

One week from tonight boys it all starts

[ToDaClub]

Fucking Twins win again

My day just keeps getting better.

[kbsooner21]

Fucking Twins win again

[ToDaClub]

I know a lot of northern folk don't have AC in the house, I assume your rich ass does??

Every house has it up here. Other wise the igloo would melt.

[jcindaville]

Hymie has a self contained igloo he keeps in the backyard to remind him of his roots. Of course he's got A/C

[ToDaClub]

How's the hangover coming?

Cuddle time tonight?

My wife just landed Best Buy account, they are based in Minneapolis, looks like she will be they a lot, so I may go with her and take in a Viking game!

I'll buy you as many millet lites u want if we can roll dice

Hangover is long gone, they last about an hour.

Take the dice and put em where the sun don't shine.

Congrats to your wife on scoring the best buy account. Let me know when she's in the Twin Cities, I'll go see her, again.

[jcindaville]

Only reached triple digits 2 times this summer. Beats the shit out of the 100+ triple digit days with 50 something in a row in 2011 and over 50 days last year.

I'll take 94 in August every year.

It's hot this week, but we have had the coolest summer I can remember here

[kbsooner21]

I know a lot of northern folk don't have AC in the house, I assume your rich ass does??

Hymie has a self contained igloo he keeps in the backyard to remind him of his roots. Of course he's got A/C

[jcindaville]

Is Millet lite some sort of dumb fucking eskimo drink?

Fucking spell check