Dating Service Opinions

[savage1]

I thought with all the controversy and hostility surrounding threads about George Bush, it might be a good idea to start another topic, in this case dating services.
I don't think there has been a thread about this before, and if there has, it has been a while.
My questions are whether you personally have ever had or know someone who has ever had an experience with either an online dating service such as Eharmony, Match.com, Date.com, Jdate, etc or an offline dating service.
If you have or know someone who has, the question is was the overall experience good, bad., did you/he meet anyone special, was it a waste of time, etc.
In general ,tell anything about the service which you feel is important/relevant and of course anything you want to tell us about the person(s) from appearance, intelligence, compatibility,etc.
I see no harm in mentioning the name of the service, but of course if Monte, Wayne, Spark, etc feels if it would be better NOT to specify which service, please state.
As you might expect, I myself have some STRONG opinions about them and in one in particular but would like to hear what you guys/ladies say first.

[TwoTonTony]

i did on of them for a short time....most of the women faslely advertised their weight specifically......I believe that dating services can not offer you the most important part of the equation and that is the attraction phase......I did it for ha ha's and banged a few on there but all in all i did not like it.....I like to be able to get a feel for how things are going by being able to communicate verbally in person.......I think it is okay for guys who can not get pussy in a regular way i suppose, but it is not for me.....

[savage1]

i did on of them for a short time....most of the women faslely advertised their weight specifically......I believe that dating services can not offer you the most important part of the equation and that is the attraction phase......I did it for ha ha's and banged a few on there but all in all i did not like it.....I like to be able to get a feel for how things are going by being able to communicate verbally in person.......I think it is okay for guys who can not get pussy in a regular way i suppose, but it is not for me.....

When you were a member, was it with an online or offline service, and did you chat first and/or see a photo first before meeting?
In all fairnes,s a lot of the online dating services encourage you to post your photo first and many allow you to chat online via instant message to let you know if you want to meet in person.
One of the biggest beefs I had with EHarmony is that people are not encouraged to post photos first and there is no instant messaging;I will elaborate later on.

[Lsufan]

I dated a few people from different dating services, but it didn't work out. It was Bush's fault.

Signed,

10DimeBry

[TwoTonTony]

When you were a member, was it with an online or offline service, and did you chat first and/or see a photo first before meeting?
In all fairnes,s a lot of the online dating services encourage you to post your photo first and many allow you to chat online via instant message to let you know if you want to meet in person.
One of the biggest beefs I had with EHarmony is that people are not encouraged to post photos first and there is no instant messaging;I will elaborate later on.

there was photos......there was phone calls....there was all that stuff.....you can not replace in person chemistry period!!! like i said i got laid, but anybody can do that.....most of the women who described themselves as athletic and toned were houses.......beware of the head shot only!!! ha ha

[savage1]

there was photos......there was phone calls....there was all that stuff.....you can not replace in person chemistry period!!! like i said i got laid, but anybody can do that.....most of the women who described themselves as athletic and toned were houses.......beware of the head shot only!!! ha ha

Well if they gave good "head," all was not lost.

[BackDoorCvr]

there was photos......there was phone calls....there was all that stuff.....you can not replace in person chemistry period!!! like i said i got laid, but anybody can do that.....most of the women who described themselves as athletic and toned were houses.......beware of the head shot only!!! ha ha

TTT,

I agree with you there. I did it for 5 or 6 months. The one thing that all of them are able to do is allow you to meet someone you wouldn't ordinarily get together with. Sometimes the way many people get together (friend of a friend, friend's cousin, etc...) isn't the best and it severly limits your pool to choose from. If you live close to a major metropolitan area, the pool to choose from opens up into the hundreds or even thousands while your friend's can only know so many single chicks. And while it may sound bad, I certainly know why many of ladies out there are unattached. I'm sure they say the same about some of us.

[BettorsChat]

You need to really live in a big city for it to be worthwhile as most of the pickings in smaller areas suck.

I did AOL and it sucks and yahoo.com which sucks as well.
E-Harmony sucks IMO too as most of the people don't have pictures plus theres like a 45 minute process.

Also I will point out that most of these women on these sites have stereotypes for the men they want. It seems as if they want a perfect match. No kids, fat wallet, great job, etc.

Did pre-dating events too which were and are a good way of enhancing your social skills, but most of the women had kids, didn't want kids, or weren't in very good shape.

And I know theres many pervs on this site that aren't fessing up like Bover, etc.

[BrezzeEaze]

I met my soon to be wife on Match...no complaints here

[savage1]

I met my soon to be wife on Match...no complaints here

Are you referring to Match.com?
Also, did you meet/chat with other ladies beside your fiancee(by the way congrats.), and if so, what about them?
Could you just tell us a little more in general about your experience if you have time.

[savage1]

You need to really live in a big city for it to be worthwhile as most of the pickings in smaller areas suck.

I did AOL and it sucks and yahoo.com which sucks as well.
E-Harmony sucks IMO too as most of the people don't have pictures plus theres like a 45 minute process.

Also I will point out that most of these women on these sites have stereotypes for the men they want. It seems as if they want a perfect match. No kids, fat wallet, great job, etc.

Did pre-dating events too which were and are a good way of enhancing your social skills, but most of the women had kids, didn't want kids, or weren't in very good shape.

And I know theres many pervs on this site that aren't fessing up like Bover, etc.

I agree 100% with the comment about many of the ladies looking for the "perfect" guy.
I will have more to say about this later based on my own experiences.

[musclemann]

Headshot

Someone mentioned above, beware of the HEADSHOT!!!!!!!!
You better believe it brother!!!!!!

[BettorsChat]

Paging LoveDoc

[CheechB03]

Woman wins $2 million in matchmaker suit

A widow won $2.1 million from a high-priced matchmaker whom she claimed failed to deliver on promises of introductions to cultured, wealthy men.

Anne Majerik, a 60-year-old social worker from Erie, Pa., claimed in a lawsuit that she paid Beverly Hills matchmaker Orly Hadida $125,000 to be introduced to men who wanted monogamous relationships, earned more than $1 million and had estates of up to $20 million.

Instead, she said, she only got a few introductions to inappropriate men. For example, her suit claimed, the matchmaker's "international banker" turned out to be "an interpreter that worked in a bank."

Orly, an Israeli beauty pageant winner who goes by her first name, countersued. She alleged Majerik is a "serial matchmaker suer" who enjoyed herself with the men she met before claiming she had been "psychologically damaged by the process" and demanding compensation.

Orly claimed Majerik became her client after she helped the widow prevail in a lawsuit against another matchmaker, San Diego-based Valenti International. She said Majerik, whose husband died in 1999, gave her "enthusiastic feedback about nearly every man to whom Orly had introduced her."

A Los Angeles Superior Court jury ruled in Majerik's favor on Tuesday, although jurors weren't entirely sympathetic to her.

"We wanted to punish the defendant, but in the amount we wanted to punish the defendant, we didn't want to reward the plaintiff," said foreman Christie Troutt. "They were both wrong."

Orly's attorney said she plans to appeal.

[savage1]

Since I started this thread in the first place, I would like to offer a few comments about datings services and one in particular.
Before, I begin, I will say that my comments could be construed as negative/biased simply because I did not find anyone after several years of attempts and since I DID find someone via my Romance Tour.
In this case(unlike in politics where I feel my beliefs are substantiated by empirical results), here I accept the possibility my beliefs may be tilted bit.
Still, I think there are some things which go beyond bias and a are based on sheer logic.
My basis thesis is that dating services were a waste of time for ME(not for everyone, although based on what I have heard and read, there are more unhappy folks than content ones).
I feel EXACTLY the opposite about the dating services which match American men with foreign ladies.
Anyways, here goes:
The basic reason guy or lady uses a dating service(lets say online) is because for whatever reason he/she is unable to meet anyone suitable by his/her own efforts.
There are many around these days because there is a market for them.
I am going to confine my comments to three biggies of which I was a member fo at least a year.
Lets take Matchcom first.
This is typical-post a photo if you like(most do), describe yourself and the type of person you are seeking(age, height, weight, interests, etc.) along with a few essay questions and hope you get some responses via email or instane message.
Now, first of all, being the way I am, I put down in my profile that I was seeking a lady 5-15 years younger;I am not defending this but am just stating the truth.
In a nutshell over the year or two I was a member I wrote to some ladies to whom I was attracted and some wrote to me who were attracted to me;unfortunately(and I am sure you have all heard the same thing), most of the ones to whom I was attracted were not attracted to me and vice versa.
Sorry I have not evolved to the point to where "looks don't matter in the long run." Also, there were a number of older women(beyond my requirements) who wrote to me-again that is not my cup of tea, and they just for a lack of a better term looked too old for me.
Geographics was another problem, as many of the ladies lived 20, 30 , 50 or even more miles away(not a problem for me but for them).
I met one lady about 15 years younger than I-she was European, spoke little English, but it was obvious after about 15 minutes that I had nothing in common with her, and I am sure she felt the same about me.
I could go on and on about Match.com, but as I have much to say about two other dating services, suffice it to say that I consider it the best of the three services of which I was a member for any length of time even though I didn't meet my match.
It has sincere people as well as a few obvious gold diggers.
It also has folks who live in other countries including South America, and I did have a few nice chats with some ladies although nothing developed.

JDATE-
This is a service for Jewish people looking to meet Jewish people of the opposite sex for the most part.
Anyways I was a member here for well over two years and met no one.
The service is similar to Match.com in the way it operates except the folks for the most part are jewish.
I encountered some of the same problems here I experienced with Match.com.
In addition geography was even more of a problem simply because Jewish population is quite small compared to the general population, and also because I do not live in a large metropolitan area.
In all honesty and some Jewish people would be appalled by what I am going to say as I myself am Jewish:
my general impression based on writing to many and getting very few responses was any or all of the above:
1) I was too old for them, 2) not good looking enough and/or tall enough 3) wasn't rich enough;I think that many assumed because I worked for govt., I wouldn't meet their income requirements, 4) wasn't wordly or sophisticated enough-that is, didn't want to go to Europe every other day for example(my profile was very funny with some George Carlin type of humor thrown in) and in general I wasn't the man of their dreams.
It did make me feel better that many who rejected and/or neglected me were there as long as I was, meaning that besides me there was not anyone "good" enough for them.
Being a straight shooter I did make a big thing that I am a Red Sox diehard and that I liked to "speculate" in various things sometimes. lol
One "sophisticated" lady went as far to tell me(internet chat) that if wanted to go to a Sox game, it would be ok if I took my daughter but NOT her;obviously, she was history shortly thereafter.
Ok-in summary-I have very negative feelings about Jdate based on my experiences (I have some Jewish male friends who feel the same way), and I would NEVER join it again even if wanted to meet someone Jewish-snooty, stuckup, unrealistic and dreamers are the terms I would use to describe most of the women I wrote and/or chatted with a JDate.
Again a few older ladies in their 60's wrote to me;some were widows and lived in Boca Raton meaning they had some bucks probably;if money was my motive I could have had a field day!

EHARMONY:
This is the one everyone knows about;you have all seen it-Dr Warren, the founder with his spiel about matching folks up by filling out a questionnaire with a zillion multiple chocie questions which takes about 30-45 minutes to complete.
Of course he is always flanked by testimonials from happily married couples.
My problems based on my experience (two years) are these:
1) Posting photos of oneself is discouraged until you "get to know the other person better."
The getting to know the other person consists of being given opportunity to ask your potential mate(via carefully controlled emails-you can't correspond with the person directly initially ) selected multiple choice questions(some of these remind me of the type of theoretical questions asked of Miss America.
contestants) .
Then the lady/man answering the questions asks multiple choice questions of you.
The process repeats itself until you and/or the other person decides whether you want to go fast track and correspond more directly.
Now keep in mind in most cases, because of recommendations of EHarmony no photos are posted(like they don't matter).
My comment is all the "harmony/synch" in the world doesn't mean a good god damn to most folks if there is no physical chemistry to begin with-so why wait to begin with????
An even bigger problem is the fact that while the 45 minute questionnaire is great in theory in that it will match you with your soulmate, in reality it is a myth and from my perspective, it creates more headaches than it is worth.
From my experiences(I played by EHarmony's rules with some folks and never met anyone- correspondence stopped somewhere along the way;some never even bothered to respond to my inititial set of questions), I would conclude that many of the ladies are expecting too much.
Many I believe felt because because both they and their potential matches had filled out long and intensive questionnaires, that there must be in fact someone who is PERFECT and is 100% like them;that obviously is nor reality, but again that is the downfall of providing such a questionnaie in the first place.
Eharmony kind of reminds me of many sports services;those who are most successful in their advertising efforts are the ones who succeed.
Dr. Warren is slick and like sports services tells you only about the "winners." From what I have read on the internet there are MANY more dissatisfied customers than satisfied one no matter how many "happy campers" he parades out there on tv.
In summary then EHarmony from my perspective anyways is a ripoff and VERY deceptive and operates under false premises.
I know this is a long post, but in closing I would say to those who are open minded and have no prejudices against foreign women-try mate1.com or latinamericancupid.com or do what I did-Try Foreign Affair(www.loveme.com).
I have tried all and have the highest regard for all of them especially Foreign Affair through which I met my lovely wife.
If you want to know more about these services, just read some of the posts from my "I am going on a Romance Tour."
There are some deceitful women here of course, but the risk reward ratio is great, and that is what counts at least for me anyways.