Anyone Else Have Gambling Ruin Their Lives??

[jcindaville]

Damn Dude, your clueless....This guy don't need encouragement in gambling right now....He needs help and needs to quit....

he is clueless on many topics. not just this one

[savage1]

I agree with the comments made that one has to find something to replace the gambling or at least not make gambling that important in the first place.
I know in my case I was betting every day until I went to visit my fiancee first in August and then in November.
However, when I arrived and was with her, gambling was the last thing on my mind;in August when I went there, the only thing that mattered was whether the Red Sox won or not.
In November, gambling was a non-event because I am not much a football fan to begin with without a bet on the game.
ps In all honesty, a lot of what I say comes with perspective, as I am older than most and have learned through experience what is good and not good for me.

[BigTicket]

The point to highlight here guys IMO is that he needs to find someone who he can be accountable to so that he can call when he wants to gamble again or even just to talk about how hard it is. Accountability is essential to quitting an addiction.

[RogerMetz]

Wow, thanks for all the support guys.. Just woke up and I cant believe all the replys.. You guys are really an amazing bunch. Today seems a little brighter.. Going to go to the gym.. And then go down to ac and start grinding out this money, I hope this weekend isnt the one where I start to run bad. Need to make this money in the next 7 days, first things first, then I will seriously look into career changes and severe lifestyle changes. Thanks for all the advice guys.. I will keep you updated on my journey..

[savage1]

The point to highlight here guys IMO is that he needs to find someone who he can be accountable to so that he can call when he wants to gamble again or even just to talk about how hard it is. Accountability is essential to quitting an addiction.

I agree with you, and equally important is finding a suitable and activity to replace the gambling.

[BigTicket]

I agree with you, and equally important is finding a suitable and activity to replace the gambling.

agreed savage

[Three Jack]

Rog, be careful. Not sure I would recommend AC to be the first step in recovery but I am no expert. I have been where you are at as well and when you try to win it back, if you do, you think you can do it again and will inevitably wind up in the same if not worse position. Look at it this way, while it is a lot of money and will be tough to climb out, it is an inexpensive life-long lesson. 10 yrs from now, you will probably look back and laugh at it...well, at least not cry! Like everyone else said, try to find a hobby, especially one that will keep you pre-occupied right before games tip/kick off....

[ScrantonKid]

Roger-
Money should not rule your soul.
Don't let it bring you down, gambling is a crazy, zany lifestyle and if you really want to win......quit gambling.My brother in law always tells me the best bet is not to bet.
Look at those around you tonight, and than grab them in your arms and give them a hug.They are the reason you are here on this planet, not some bookie who could care less if you win or lose.
It is better to lose at gambling than to lose those around you.If you have the need to continue gambling than contact Gamblers' Anomynous...they can help.
Do not fret.If you were to die tomorrow, than what would become of those you love.They are the reason to hang on and to seek help for your addiction.
He who helps himself helps others.You have taken the first step in recognizing your addiction...it is now time to take the next step, and get help. Don't feel ashamed or embarrassed, there are others like you that have fallen,some of whom have gotten help, some of whom have not.It is up to you, my friend to take the next step...please respond and let me know...I care.

[lumpy]

Roger,

I would recommend going to gamblers anonymous and give up gambling in general. I have been in bad situations before, never to that extent, but I have seen friends in similar situations. When you are that deep into gambling there is no way you are ever going to win because no amount is ever good enough. I have seen a friend of mine win $30,000 in a casino during a 2-day span and lose it all back plus $10,000 of his own because he didn't know when to quit. He also had a gorgeous wife with a kick ass job, the keyword is HAD. Go to a gamblers anonymous meeting in your town and you will meet some of the happiest people ever. Most of the people have been in your shoes, maybe not to the extent, but can surely relate to your experience. People that go to the GA meetings and have stuck with it are some of the happiest people you will meet because they don't have to worry about their gambling problems and don't have to scramble for money anymore. You are still young enough to get your shit together, get out of your situation and do good with your life, trust me I have done it. I racked up $15,000 worth of gambling debt during college that I had to get a loan to pay for, but I graduated have a good job, started a family and can now bet $20 -$50 dollars every now and then on a game and enjoy it. It is not the end of the world, but you must address the problem now and get it taken care before it is. I wish you the best of luck and will pray for you.

[Spearit]

Roger- There is nothing I can say that hasn't been said.The truth of the matter may concern your identity issues. Your addictions are covering a deeper issue- one that will not be brought to the surface until the addictions are placed aside.

In only one year have I noticed things you have mentioned in myself and then it made me stay away for a whole month to gain perspective in my life. What occurred was quite amazing- I no longer had to make these huge bets to try and gain something- rather it is ego, wealth, image or whatever.

I no longer felt if you lose you were a gambler and if you win you are a professional gambler. (The competiveness of my brothers was an issue. never- would I have seen it- if I didn't stop and take stock of myself.)

But- Its all semantics- because if you win- you typically get a big head and bet as if you can't lose- and their goes the green -you were so proud of winning. If for once I would step back and remember what I just accomplished - it would remind me the value of a buck.

We all fight with this same demon but I am a fast learner- just my education has been quite expensive. You can be also.

I believe the first thing that I did when I quit for the whole month - was to not go on the computer for the month while I was withdrawing from gambling. I deleted my betting sites and stayed away from my usuals contacts or people that would talk about betting. So- You may try the same. If you need to go on the computer -place all betting items in a delete mode or at least in a links- to hide it or get rid of it.

Because you have won and it seemed easy- the curse is that you will want to duplicate it.-- No -Sorry the same results will occur. You haven't changed your thinking so you won't change the inevitability of your gambling either.

Now - you have mentioned about guys here that work with money management- the toughest area of gambling next to how to play your bets. Middling is safe but maybe not your cup of tea. Overall, we all struggle to win consistently - or if not - we try to make it up on a cold table.

Roger- I wish ya the best - But let it go. Talk it over with family - State that you are going to get help. Ask for their support and let em know that you will be checking in with them or somebody significant in your life on a daily basis.

None of us are without our faults- so don't allow yourself to lose your spirit----Spearit

[Robber John]

Hate to be so blunt but maybe you know how those losers at the poker table feel when you take their money.When you start careing a little more about where your money comes from you may be able to handle it better. Get some help and dont take losing personal you are on the right tract by asking for help good luck to you maybe you should try to stop and stop others. Good luck to you

[theasterisk]

spearit, well said buddy...roger these are some ghreat insights and thoughts that should be taken to heart...good luck my friend!

[bryce]

Whatever happened to Roger?

[jcindaville]

Whatever happened to Roger?

You have too much time on your hands. Lol

[DenJamTuck]

Roger the universe is rooting for you. Up to you now you have to take the effort and action. The way I stopped my downward spiral, even though i could pay off debt to my local, i was able to make monthly payments to him which forced me to stop until it was paid off. Then of course, after several months later i would get slowly back in, with the thought in my mind that wagering is not a sprint -- it's a marathon and you have plenty of time to win, while slowing down your loses at the same time. Bottom line, treat gambling as a hobby and not as an addiction and if you can't do that, you need to change your way of living... Giants in 7