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By Jake Anderson
MEN -- do you see beautiful women walking down the street -- women 20, 30, even 40 years younger than you -- and think, "There's no hope they would be interested in me?"
Well, think again. The new book, I'm Not Her Grandpa, I'm Her Old Man: a Guide to Dating Much Younger Women, tells you exactly how to go about it.
"The most important thing to do is act your age," says the author, Dr. Emile Zoloff.
"The primary mistake most men make is trying to pretend they're close to the age of the girl they want to date, letting her know they're 'down' with Britney or Jennifer Love Hewitt or by wearing low-rise jeans or baggy pants three sizes too big. Those kinds of guys are readily available. All a girl has to do is go to a **** and she's got her love-sponge."
Dr. Zoloff says older men appeal to young girls because they offer something her peers can't.
"Obviously, money and power are the two main things," Zoloff goes on. "Hugh Hefner doesn't get gorgeous blondes a half-century younger because they happen to dig geezers who walk around in their pajamas and drool into a pipe. He's got a mansion, a pool with a grotto, and best of all a take-it- or-leave-it attitude.
"If you don't have all that money you can still ACT like you do," Zoloff says. "Charge things like limos and first class plane tickets. Hell, just go to an airport, pretend like you just arrived, offer a flight attendant a ride to the city in the limo you hired, and you're in!"
Zoloff says that because he has neither money nor power he's spent a lifetime learning other tricks. "It doesn't take much to turn 'loser' into 'lover.'
"Join an Internet chat room and use your wisdom and charm to blow the 20-something guys off the boards," Zoloff suggests. "TOS them for being crude or dazzle them with the fact that you can actually spell. Throw words like 'dissonance' or 'haberdasher' into the chat. Chicks like smart guys.
"You can also hire a college girl to be your 'wing man.' Pay her minimum wage. It beats working at Mickey D's. Take her to a bar and have her fawn over you and laugh at your jokes. Other girls will be intrigued. Then pretend to blow your 'date' off, turn to the nearest cutie and loudly complain, 'What is it with young kids? Why do you need your mother's permission to fly with me to Cancun for the weekend?'
"Watch what happens. Spend the night together and then tell her 'something came up' at your factory in Beijing. Cancun is out and chances are she won't want to go to China.
"You can also try being 'the daddy type.' It's a cliche, but some young girls are looking for the father they never had. Wear a business suit, carry a briefcase and you'll be amazed what you pull in."
Dr. Zoloff, 45, lives with his mother. He says that gave him the impetus to write his book.
"I haven't seen her in over three months," he says proudly. "I've been in dorm rooms, motels, and the back of my van which is nicknamed 'Squeals on Wheels.' Trust me. These suggestions work."
MEN -- do you see beautiful women walking down the street -- women 20, 30, even 40 years younger than you -- and think, "There's no hope they would be interested in me?"
Well, think again. The new book, I'm Not Her Grandpa, I'm Her Old Man: a Guide to Dating Much Younger Women, tells you exactly how to go about it.
"The most important thing to do is act your age," says the author, Dr. Emile Zoloff.
"The primary mistake most men make is trying to pretend they're close to the age of the girl they want to date, letting her know they're 'down' with Britney or Jennifer Love Hewitt or by wearing low-rise jeans or baggy pants three sizes too big. Those kinds of guys are readily available. All a girl has to do is go to a **** and she's got her love-sponge."
Dr. Zoloff says older men appeal to young girls because they offer something her peers can't.
"Obviously, money and power are the two main things," Zoloff goes on. "Hugh Hefner doesn't get gorgeous blondes a half-century younger because they happen to dig geezers who walk around in their pajamas and drool into a pipe. He's got a mansion, a pool with a grotto, and best of all a take-it- or-leave-it attitude.
"If you don't have all that money you can still ACT like you do," Zoloff says. "Charge things like limos and first class plane tickets. Hell, just go to an airport, pretend like you just arrived, offer a flight attendant a ride to the city in the limo you hired, and you're in!"
Zoloff says that because he has neither money nor power he's spent a lifetime learning other tricks. "It doesn't take much to turn 'loser' into 'lover.'
"Join an Internet chat room and use your wisdom and charm to blow the 20-something guys off the boards," Zoloff suggests. "TOS them for being crude or dazzle them with the fact that you can actually spell. Throw words like 'dissonance' or 'haberdasher' into the chat. Chicks like smart guys.
"You can also hire a college girl to be your 'wing man.' Pay her minimum wage. It beats working at Mickey D's. Take her to a bar and have her fawn over you and laugh at your jokes. Other girls will be intrigued. Then pretend to blow your 'date' off, turn to the nearest cutie and loudly complain, 'What is it with young kids? Why do you need your mother's permission to fly with me to Cancun for the weekend?'
"Watch what happens. Spend the night together and then tell her 'something came up' at your factory in Beijing. Cancun is out and chances are she won't want to go to China.
"You can also try being 'the daddy type.' It's a cliche, but some young girls are looking for the father they never had. Wear a business suit, carry a briefcase and you'll be amazed what you pull in."
Dr. Zoloff, 45, lives with his mother. He says that gave him the impetus to write his book.
"I haven't seen her in over three months," he says proudly. "I've been in dorm rooms, motels, and the back of my van which is nicknamed 'Squeals on Wheels.' Trust me. These suggestions work."
SPANK The Naughty GIRL AGAIN ????? 
SS........long time NO see !!
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