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A man died and went to heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, "What are all those clocks?"
"Those are Lie-Clocks", answered St. Peter.
"Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move."
"Oh," said the man, "Whose clock is that?"
"That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie."
"Incredible," said the man. "And whose clock is that one?"
St. Peter responded, "That's Abraham Lincolns's clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abe told only two lies in his entire life."
"Where's George W. Bush's clock?" asked the man.
"Bush's clock is in Jesus' office. He's using it as a ceiling fan!"
"Those are Lie-Clocks", answered St. Peter.
"Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move."
"Oh," said the man, "Whose clock is that?"
"That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie."
"Incredible," said the man. "And whose clock is that one?"
St. Peter responded, "That's Abraham Lincolns's clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abe told only two lies in his entire life."
"Where's George W. Bush's clock?" asked the man.
"Bush's clock is in Jesus' office. He's using it as a ceiling fan!"
It's always noon somewhere! 
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