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Answers from my Doctor...........

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  • Answers from my Doctor...........

    QUESTION: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong
    life. Is this true?

    ANSWER: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it...don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live
    longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap.

    Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?

    ANSWER: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of
    delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.

    Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?

    ANSWER: No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out of grain. Bottoms up!

    Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?

    ANSWER: Well, if you have a body and you have body fat, your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.

    Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?

    ANSWER: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain...Good

    Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?

    ANSWER: YOU'RE NOT LISTENING!!!. Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you?

    Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?

    ANSWER: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.

    Q: Is chocolate bad for me?

    ANSWER: Are you crazy? HELLO ..... Cocoa beans . another vegetable!!! It's the best feel-good food around!

    Q: Is swimming good for your figure?

    ANSWER: If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me.

    Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?

    ANSWER: Hey! 'Round' is a shape!



    Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets and remember, "Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the
    intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well > preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - chocolate in one hand - strawberries in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and screaming - WOO HOO! What a Ride!"

  • #2
    LMAO!! Thats pretty funny stuff!!

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    • #3
      This Is Great. :D

      If it were only this easy.
      "Calling an illegal alien an 'undocumented immigrant'
      is like calling a drug dealer an 'unlicensed pharmacist'"

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      • #4
        What Bullshit Rj!!!

        I Am A Registered Dietitian With A Minor In Exercise Physiology. Reading This Crap Hurt My Eyes! You Want To Live Longer You Need To Eat Right, Exercise, And Hit Three Team Parlays On A Regular Basis!

        Later

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        • #5
          any sides today in betting RJ

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          • #6
            LMAO....Robb Mack just justifying his career choice

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            • #7
              Originally posted by Watchtower76
              any sides today in betting RJ

              just posted buddy

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              • #8
                Originally posted by ROBB MACK
                What Bullshit Rj!!!

                I Am A Registered Dietitian With A Minor In Exercise Physiology. Reading This Crap Hurt My Eyes! You Want To Live Longer You Need To Eat Right, Exercise, And Hit Three Team Parlays On A Regular Basis!

                Later
                "And hit three team parlays on a regular basis" LMFAO

                ~~~ Tigger

                Comment

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