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In honor of his return to gold, I thought I would post some of the better jokes we've heard over the past 5 months...
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One of my favorites...
The Pope and Tiger Woods died on the same day and because of an administrative mix up the Pope went to hell and Tiger Woods went to heaven. The Pope explains the situation to the administrative clerk in hell, and after checking the paperwork admits that there is an error.
“However”, the clerk explains, “it would be 24 hours before it can be rectified”. The next day the Pope is called and Hell’s staff bids him farewell. On the way up, the Pope meets Tiger Woods coming down from heaven and they stop to have a chat.
“Sorry about the mix up”, apologizes the Pope.
“No problem” replied Tiger Woods.
Pope: “I am really anxious to get to heaven.”
Tiger: “Why is that?”
Pope: “All my life I have wanted to meet the Virgin Mary.”
Tiger: “You’re a day late.” -
How does Tiger keep track of what hole he is playing?
By the tattoo on her back.Comment
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In a recent survey 1000 women were asked: "Would you sleep with Tiger Woods if you had a chance?"
Seventy Five percent said, "Never again."Comment
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Tiger and Elin have signed a new prenuptual agreement. According to the new contract, the next time Tiger plays a round, Elin will hand him his balls.Comment
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Post 'em if you got 'em...Comment
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The police asked Tiger's wife how many times she hit him. "I can't remember," Elin said, "just put me down for a 5."Comment
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What kind of club did Elin swing at Tiger? Looks like it was a bitching wedge.Comment
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Did you hear about Tiger's last outing? He drove into a tree, then ended up with a bad lie.Comment
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What do Tiger Woods and baby seals have in common? They're both in danger of being clubbed by Norwegians!Comment
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What were Tiger Woods and his wife doing out at 2.30 in the morning? They went clubbing.Comment
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