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Understanding Engineers
> >> *Understanding Engineers - Take One*
> >> * * *Two engineering students were crossing the campus when one said,
> >> "Where
> >> did you get such a great bike?" *
> >> * * *The second engineer replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday
> >> minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike. She
> >> threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, "Take
> >> what
> >> you want." *
> >> * * *The first engineer nodded approvingly, "Good choice; the clothes
> >> probably wouldn't have fit."*
> >> *Understanding Engineers - Take Two*
> >> * * *To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the
> >> glass
> >> is half empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to
> >> be.*
> >> * * *Understanding Engineers - Take Three*
> >> * * *A pastor, a doctor and an engineer were waiting one morning for a
> >> particularly slow group of golfers. The engineer fumed, "What's with
> >> these
> >> guys? We must have been waiting for 15 minutes!" *
> >> * * *The doctor chimed in, "I don't know, but I've never seen such
> >> ineptitude!" *
> >> * * *The pastor said, "Hey, here comes the greens keeper. Let's have a
> >> word
> >> with him." "Hi George! Say, what's with that group ahead of us?
> >> They're
> >> rather slow, aren't they?" *
> >> * The greens keeper replied, "Oh, yes, that's a group of blind
> >> firefighters. They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire let
> >> them play for free anytime." *
> >> * The group was silent for a moment. The pastor said, "That's so sad. I
> >> think I will say a special prayer for them tonight."*
> >> * The doctor said, "Good idea. And I'm going to contact my
> >> ophthalmologist
> >> buddy and see if there's anything he can do for them."*
> >> * The engineer said, "Why can't these guys play at night?"*
> >> *Understanding Engineers - Take Four*
> >> * What is the difference between Mechanical Engineers and Civil
> >> Engineers?
> >> Mechanical Engineers build weapons and Civil Engineers build targets.*
> >> *Understanding Engineers - Take Five*
> >> *The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The
> >> graduate
> >> with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with
> >> an
> >> Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with an
> >> Arts
> >> degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"*
> >> * * *Understanding Engineers - Take Six*
> >> * Three engineering students were gathered together discussing the
> >> possible
> >> designers of the human body. One said, "It was a mechanical engineer.
> >> Just
> >> look at all the joints." *
> >> * Another said, "No, it was an electrical engineer. The nervous system
> >> has
> >> many thousands of e electrical connections." *
> >> * The last one said, "Actually it was a civil engineer. Who else would
> >> run
> >> a toxic waste pipeline through a recreational area?"*
> >> * **Understanding Engineers - Take Seven*
> >> * * *Normal people believe that "if it ain't broke, don't fix it."
> >> Engineers believe that "if it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough
> >> features
> >> yet".*
> >> * **Understanding Engineers - Take Eight*
> >> * * *An architect, an artist and an engineer were discussing whether it
> >> was
> >> better to spend time with the wife or a mistress. The architect said he
> >> enjoyed time with his wife, building a solid foundation for an enduring
> >> relationship. *
> >> * The artist said he enjoyed time with his mistress, because of the
> >> passion
> >> and mystery he found there. *
> >> * The engineer said, "I like both." "Both?" asked the architect and
> >> artist. "Yeah. If you have a wife and a mistress, they will each assume
> >> you are spending time with the other woman, and you can go to the lab and
> >> get some work done."*
> >> *Understanding Engineers - Take Nine*
> >> * **An engineer was crossing a road one-day when a frog called out to him
> >> and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess." He bent
> >> over, picked up the frog and put it in his pocket. The frog spoke up
> >> again
> >> and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I
> >> will
> >> stay with you for one week." The engineer took the frog out of h is
> >> pocket,
> >> smiled at it and returned it to the pocket. The frog then cried out, "If
> >> you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I'll stay with you for a
> >> week
> >> and do whatever you want. The engineer smiled again and put the frog
> >> back
> >> into his pocket. Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? Why
> >> won't
> >> you kiss me?"*
> >> * The engineer said, "Look, I'm an engineer. I don't have time for a
> >> girlfriend, but a talking frog, now that's cool."*
ps Maybe I am dumb, but could someone explain take #5 to me?
> >> *Understanding Engineers - Take One*
> >> * * *Two engineering students were crossing the campus when one said,
> >> "Where
> >> did you get such a great bike?" *
> >> * * *The second engineer replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday
> >> minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike. She
> >> threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, "Take
> >> what
> >> you want." *
> >> * * *The first engineer nodded approvingly, "Good choice; the clothes
> >> probably wouldn't have fit."*
> >> *Understanding Engineers - Take Two*
> >> * * *To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the
> >> glass
> >> is half empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to
> >> be.*
> >> * * *Understanding Engineers - Take Three*
> >> * * *A pastor, a doctor and an engineer were waiting one morning for a
> >> particularly slow group of golfers. The engineer fumed, "What's with
> >> these
> >> guys? We must have been waiting for 15 minutes!" *
> >> * * *The doctor chimed in, "I don't know, but I've never seen such
> >> ineptitude!" *
> >> * * *The pastor said, "Hey, here comes the greens keeper. Let's have a
> >> word
> >> with him." "Hi George! Say, what's with that group ahead of us?
> >> They're
> >> rather slow, aren't they?" *
> >> * The greens keeper replied, "Oh, yes, that's a group of blind
> >> firefighters. They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire let
> >> them play for free anytime." *
> >> * The group was silent for a moment. The pastor said, "That's so sad. I
> >> think I will say a special prayer for them tonight."*
> >> * The doctor said, "Good idea. And I'm going to contact my
> >> ophthalmologist
> >> buddy and see if there's anything he can do for them."*
> >> * The engineer said, "Why can't these guys play at night?"*
> >> *Understanding Engineers - Take Four*
> >> * What is the difference between Mechanical Engineers and Civil
> >> Engineers?
> >> Mechanical Engineers build weapons and Civil Engineers build targets.*
> >> *Understanding Engineers - Take Five*
> >> *The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The
> >> graduate
> >> with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with
> >> an
> >> Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with an
> >> Arts
> >> degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"*
> >> * * *Understanding Engineers - Take Six*
> >> * Three engineering students were gathered together discussing the
> >> possible
> >> designers of the human body. One said, "It was a mechanical engineer.
> >> Just
> >> look at all the joints." *
> >> * Another said, "No, it was an electrical engineer. The nervous system
> >> has
> >> many thousands of e electrical connections." *
> >> * The last one said, "Actually it was a civil engineer. Who else would
> >> run
> >> a toxic waste pipeline through a recreational area?"*
> >> * **Understanding Engineers - Take Seven*
> >> * * *Normal people believe that "if it ain't broke, don't fix it."
> >> Engineers believe that "if it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough
> >> features
> >> yet".*
> >> * **Understanding Engineers - Take Eight*
> >> * * *An architect, an artist and an engineer were discussing whether it
> >> was
> >> better to spend time with the wife or a mistress. The architect said he
> >> enjoyed time with his wife, building a solid foundation for an enduring
> >> relationship. *
> >> * The artist said he enjoyed time with his mistress, because of the
> >> passion
> >> and mystery he found there. *
> >> * The engineer said, "I like both." "Both?" asked the architect and
> >> artist. "Yeah. If you have a wife and a mistress, they will each assume
> >> you are spending time with the other woman, and you can go to the lab and
> >> get some work done."*
> >> *Understanding Engineers - Take Nine*
> >> * **An engineer was crossing a road one-day when a frog called out to him
> >> and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess." He bent
> >> over, picked up the frog and put it in his pocket. The frog spoke up
> >> again
> >> and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I
> >> will
> >> stay with you for one week." The engineer took the frog out of h is
> >> pocket,
> >> smiled at it and returned it to the pocket. The frog then cried out, "If
> >> you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I'll stay with you for a
> >> week
> >> and do whatever you want. The engineer smiled again and put the frog
> >> back
> >> into his pocket. Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? Why
> >> won't
> >> you kiss me?"*
> >> * The engineer said, "Look, I'm an engineer. I don't have time for a
> >> girlfriend, but a talking frog, now that's cool."*
ps Maybe I am dumb, but could someone explain take #5 to me?
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