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1. I love you in 9 different languages
English . . . . . . . . . .. . . . . I Love You
Spanish. .. . . . .. . . . . . . . . . Te Amo
French . . . . . . . . . .. . . . Je T'aime
German . .. . . . . . . . . . . . . lch Liebe Dich
Japanese . . . . . . . . . .. . . . Ai Shite Imasu
Italian . .. . . . . . . . . . . . . . Ti Amo
Chinese.. . . . . . . . . .. . . . Wo Ai Nin
Norwegian . . . . . . . . . .. Jeg Elsker Deg
Kansas, Oklahoma, Texas, North Carolina, South Carolina, Georgia, Florida, Tennessee, Maine, Missouri, Mississippi, Montana, Louisiana, Virginia, West Virginia and Kentucky
. . . . .. . . . . . Nice ass. Get in the truck.
2. Little Cowboy
A lady went into a bar in Waco and saw a cowboy with his feet propped up on a table. He had the biggest boots she'd ever seen. The woman asked the cowboy if it's true what they say about men with big feet. The cowboy grinned and said, "Shore is, little lady. Why don't you come on out to the bunkhouse and let me prove it to you?" The woman wanted to find out for herself, so she spent the night with him. The next morning she handed him a $100 bill. Blushing, he said, "Well, thankee, ma'am. Ah'm real flattered. Ain't nobody ever paid me fer mah services before." "Don't be flattered... take the money and buy yourself some boots that fit.
3. Banging & Bicycles!
One day Little Johny went to his father, and asked him if he could buy him a $200 bicycle for his birthday. Little Johny's father said, "Johny, we have a $80,000 mortgage on the house, and you want me to buy you a bicycle??? Wait until Christmas!" Christmas came around, and Little Johny asked again. The father said, "Well, the mortgage is still extremely high, sorry
kiddo. Ask me again some other time." Well, about 2 days later, the boy was seen walking out of the house with all his belongings in a suitcase. The father felt sorry for him, and asked him why he was leaving. Little Johny said, "Yesterday I was walking past your room, and I heard you say that you were 'pulling out,' and Mommy said that 'you should
wait because she was coming, too....'
"And I'll be DAMNED if I'm gonna be stuck with your $80,000 mortgage!"
4. Hospitals
A woman called a local hospital. "Hello. Could you connect me to the person who gives information about patients. I'd like to find out if a patient is getting better, doing as expected, or getting worse."
The voice on the other end said, "What is the patient's name and room number?"
"Sarah Finkel, room 302."
"I'll connect you with the nursing station."
"3-A Nursing Station. How can I help You?"
"I'd like to know the condition of Sarah Finkel in room 302."
"Just a moment. Let me look at her records. Mrs. Finkel is doing very well. In fact, she's had two full meals, her blood pressure is fine, to be taken off the heart monitor in a couple of hours and, if she continues this improvement, Dr. Cohen is going to send her home Tuesday at noon."
The woman said, "What a relief! Oh, that's fantastic... that's wonderful news!"
The nurse said, "From your enthusiasm, I take it you are a close family member or a very close friend!"
"Neither! I'm Sarah Finkel in 302! Nobody here tells me shit."
5. Girl Next Door
English . . . . . . . . . .. . . . . I Love You
Spanish. .. . . . .. . . . . . . . . . Te Amo
French . . . . . . . . . .. . . . Je T'aime
German . .. . . . . . . . . . . . . lch Liebe Dich
Japanese . . . . . . . . . .. . . . Ai Shite Imasu
Italian . .. . . . . . . . . . . . . . Ti Amo
Chinese.. . . . . . . . . .. . . . Wo Ai Nin
Norwegian . . . . . . . . . .. Jeg Elsker Deg
Kansas, Oklahoma, Texas, North Carolina, South Carolina, Georgia, Florida, Tennessee, Maine, Missouri, Mississippi, Montana, Louisiana, Virginia, West Virginia and Kentucky
. . . . .. . . . . . Nice ass. Get in the truck.
2. Little Cowboy
A lady went into a bar in Waco and saw a cowboy with his feet propped up on a table. He had the biggest boots she'd ever seen. The woman asked the cowboy if it's true what they say about men with big feet. The cowboy grinned and said, "Shore is, little lady. Why don't you come on out to the bunkhouse and let me prove it to you?" The woman wanted to find out for herself, so she spent the night with him. The next morning she handed him a $100 bill. Blushing, he said, "Well, thankee, ma'am. Ah'm real flattered. Ain't nobody ever paid me fer mah services before." "Don't be flattered... take the money and buy yourself some boots that fit.
3. Banging & Bicycles!
One day Little Johny went to his father, and asked him if he could buy him a $200 bicycle for his birthday. Little Johny's father said, "Johny, we have a $80,000 mortgage on the house, and you want me to buy you a bicycle??? Wait until Christmas!" Christmas came around, and Little Johny asked again. The father said, "Well, the mortgage is still extremely high, sorry
kiddo. Ask me again some other time." Well, about 2 days later, the boy was seen walking out of the house with all his belongings in a suitcase. The father felt sorry for him, and asked him why he was leaving. Little Johny said, "Yesterday I was walking past your room, and I heard you say that you were 'pulling out,' and Mommy said that 'you should
wait because she was coming, too....'
"And I'll be DAMNED if I'm gonna be stuck with your $80,000 mortgage!"
4. Hospitals
A woman called a local hospital. "Hello. Could you connect me to the person who gives information about patients. I'd like to find out if a patient is getting better, doing as expected, or getting worse."
The voice on the other end said, "What is the patient's name and room number?"
"Sarah Finkel, room 302."
"I'll connect you with the nursing station."
"3-A Nursing Station. How can I help You?"
"I'd like to know the condition of Sarah Finkel in room 302."
"Just a moment. Let me look at her records. Mrs. Finkel is doing very well. In fact, she's had two full meals, her blood pressure is fine, to be taken off the heart monitor in a couple of hours and, if she continues this improvement, Dr. Cohen is going to send her home Tuesday at noon."
The woman said, "What a relief! Oh, that's fantastic... that's wonderful news!"
The nurse said, "From your enthusiasm, I take it you are a close family member or a very close friend!"
"Neither! I'm Sarah Finkel in 302! Nobody here tells me shit."
5. Girl Next Door
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