Tweet
On their 50th anniversary, a wife found the negligee she wore on her
wedding night and put it on. She went to her husband, and said: "Honey,
do you remember this?" He looked up from his
newspaper and said: "Yes dear, I do. You wore that same negligee the night
we were married"
She said, "Yes, that's right. Do you remember what you said to me that
night?" He nodded and said, "Yes dear, I said; 'Oh baby, I'm going to
suck the life out of those boobs and screw your brains out."
She giggled and said; "That's exactly what you said. So now it's Fifty
Years later, and I'm in the same negligee. What do you have to say
tonight?"
He looked her up and down and replied. "Mission accomplished."
A teacher asked her class, "What do you want out of life?"
A little girl in the back row raised her hand and said,
"All I want Out of life is four little animals, just like my Mom always
says".
The teacher asked, "Really and what four little animals would that
be?"
The little girl said, "A mink on my back and a jaguar in the garage,a tiger in the bed and a jackass to pay for all of it."
A married couple is driving along a highway doing a steady 60 miles per
hour. The wife is behind the wheel. Her husband suddenly looks across at
her and speaks in a clear voice. "I know we've been married for twenty
years, but I want a divorce." The wife says nothing, keeps looking at
the road ahead but slowly
increases her speed to 65 mph. The husband speaks again. "I don't want
you to try and talk me out of it," he says, "because I've
been having an affair with your best friend, and she's a far better
lover than you are."
Again the wife stays quiet, but grips the steering wheel more tightly
and slowly increases the speed to 75.
He pushes his luck. "I want the house," he says insistently.. Up to 80.
"I want the car, too," he continues. 85 mph. "And," he says, "I'll have
the bank accounts, all the credit cards and
the boat!" The car slowly starts veering towards a massive concrete
bridge. This makes him nervous, so he asks her, "Isn't there anything you
want?" The wife at last replies in a quiet and controlled voice. "No,
I've got everything I need," she says. "Oh, really," he inquires, "so
what have you got?" Just before they slam into the wall at 85 mph, the
wife turns to him
and smiles. "The airbag."
Moral of the Story: Women are crazy!!!! Don't mess with them!!
wedding night and put it on. She went to her husband, and said: "Honey,
do you remember this?" He looked up from his
newspaper and said: "Yes dear, I do. You wore that same negligee the night
we were married"
She said, "Yes, that's right. Do you remember what you said to me that
night?" He nodded and said, "Yes dear, I said; 'Oh baby, I'm going to
suck the life out of those boobs and screw your brains out."
She giggled and said; "That's exactly what you said. So now it's Fifty
Years later, and I'm in the same negligee. What do you have to say
tonight?"
He looked her up and down and replied. "Mission accomplished."
A teacher asked her class, "What do you want out of life?"
A little girl in the back row raised her hand and said,
"All I want Out of life is four little animals, just like my Mom always
says".
The teacher asked, "Really and what four little animals would that
be?"
The little girl said, "A mink on my back and a jaguar in the garage,a tiger in the bed and a jackass to pay for all of it."
A married couple is driving along a highway doing a steady 60 miles per
hour. The wife is behind the wheel. Her husband suddenly looks across at
her and speaks in a clear voice. "I know we've been married for twenty
years, but I want a divorce." The wife says nothing, keeps looking at
the road ahead but slowly
increases her speed to 65 mph. The husband speaks again. "I don't want
you to try and talk me out of it," he says, "because I've
been having an affair with your best friend, and she's a far better
lover than you are."
Again the wife stays quiet, but grips the steering wheel more tightly
and slowly increases the speed to 75.
He pushes his luck. "I want the house," he says insistently.. Up to 80.
"I want the car, too," he continues. 85 mph. "And," he says, "I'll have
the bank accounts, all the credit cards and
the boat!" The car slowly starts veering towards a massive concrete
bridge. This makes him nervous, so he asks her, "Isn't there anything you
want?" The wife at last replies in a quiet and controlled voice. "No,
I've got everything I need," she says. "Oh, really," he inquires, "so
what have you got?" Just before they slam into the wall at 85 mph, the
wife turns to him
and smiles. "The airbag."
Moral of the Story: Women are crazy!!!! Don't mess with them!!
Comment