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  • pick up lines

    Pick up lines that may get you killed:





    If you and I were squirrels, could I bust a nut in your hole?

    I'd like to wrap your legs around my head and wear you like a feed bag.

    If it's true that we are what we eat, I could be you by morning!

    How do you like your eggs: poached, scrambled, or fertilized?

    I was about to go masturbate and I needed a name to go with your face.

    You are so fine that I'd eat your shit just to see where it came from.

    My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can't hold it in.

    Roses are red. Violets are blue. I like spaghetti. Let's go fuck.

    Is that a keg in your pants? 'Cause I would love to tap that ass!

    If your right leg was Thanksgiving, and your left leg was Christmas, could I meet you between the holidays?

    You remind me of a championship bass, I don't know whether to mount you or eat you!

    Your parents must be retarded, because you are special

    Could I touch your belly button . . . from the inside?

    I'm not too good at algebra, but doesn't U+I = 69?

    How about we play lion and lion tamer? You hold your mouth open, and I'll give you the meat.

    Guy: "Would you like to dance?"
    Girl: "I don't care for this song and surely wouldn't dance with you."
    Guy: "I'm sorry, you must have misunderstood me, I said you look fat in those pants"

    I'm new in town, could I have directions to your house.

    Fuck me if I'm wrong, but is your name Yolanda?

    I love every bone in your body - especially mine.

    You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.

    Hey baby, what's your sign? Caution, slippery when wet, dangerous curves ahead, yield?

    I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him? I think he went into this motel room.

    Wanna play Pearl Harbor?....Its a game where I lay back while you blow the hell out of me.

    Your body's name must be Visa, because it's everywhere I want to be.

    Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?

    I may not be the best looking guy here, but I'm the only one talking to you.

    That shirt looks very becoming on you, but if I were on you, I'd be coming too.

    I'd like to screw your brains out, but it appears that someone beat me to it.

    Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a braille name tag.

  • #2
    allow me to add a few...

    legs is the word of the day....now lets go spread the word.

    Guy "do you have any white in you."
    Girl "no"
    Guy "want some"
    lets do this!!!

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    • #3
      I was in the local Target yesterday. There was an incredible hot chick. I walked up to her and said "Hi". She kept walking as if she never saw me. LOL

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      • #4
        Originally posted by CheechB03
        I was in the local Target yesterday. There was an incredible hot chick. I walked up to her and said "Hi". She kept walking as if she never saw me. LOL
        You should of farted her way..that always get me attention
        NFL Kruise
        2-2*

        *updated as of 9/9

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