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BOYS I GOT INTO QUITE A DEAL LAST NIGHT. WENT TO THIS TITTY BAR KINDA A DIVE BUT A LOT OF FUN. WELL THEY ANNOUNCE THEY ARE HAVING A ICE CREAM EATING CONTEST AND THEY NEED FIVE CONTESTANTS AND THEY START CALLING NAMES AND I BE DAMNED IF THEY DIDNT CALL MY NAME I THOUGHT SHIT WHAT DO I DO SO I GO UP ON STAGE EVERYBODY IS LOUD AND RAISING HELL. THEY EXPLAIN THE RULES FIVE GIRLS SITTING ON CHAIR WITH THEIR LEGS SPREAD EAGLE AND THEIR SNATCH FULL OF ICE CREAM. FIRST ONE TO EAT ALL THE ICE CREAM AND LICK IT CLEAN WINS. WELL I GOT PUT WITH A GIRL I THINK I COULD HAVE DROVE MY TRUCK INTO HER SNATCH AND TURNED IT AROUND AND COME BACK OUT. JESUS SHE HAD A LOT OF ICE CREAM IN HER. WELL THEY SO GO AND I START EATING AS FAST AS I CAN THE GIRLS ARE HOLLERING LIKE FIVE WILD MONKEYS YA THOUGHT THEY NEVER HAD THEIR COOCH TAKEN CARE OF BEFORE. WELL THE BITCH IAM WITH STARTS SCREAMING I CANT BREATHE I CANT BREATHE I SAID SHUT UP BITCH I AM THE ONE WHO CANT BREATHE. SHE QUITS HOLLERING AND I FINISH OFF THE ICE CREAM AND JUMP BACK TO SEE HOW I DID. BY GOSH I WON BUT SHIT MY JAWS HURT MY TONGUE HURT I THOUGHT I SUFFOCATED MY SELF AND I BARFED ICE CREAM THE REST OF THE NIGHT. AND FOUND OUT THER WAS NO PRIZE JUST FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY.:D 
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