Mohammed's first day of school

[kbsooner21]

> Mohammed entered his classroom on the first day of school.
>
> "What's your name?" asked the teacher.
>
> "Mohammed," he replied.
>
> "You're in America now," replied the teacher, "So from now on you will be known as Kevin."
>
> Mohammed returned home after school.
>
> "How was your day, Mohammed?" his mother asked.
>
> "My name is not Mohammed. I'm in America and now my name is Kevin."
>
> "Are you ashamed of your name? Are you trying to dishonor your parents, your heritage, your religion?
>
>
>
> Shame on you!" And his mother beat him.
>
> Then she called his father, who beat him again.
>
> The next day Mohammed returned to school. The teacher saw all of his bruises.
>
> "What happened to you, Kevin? she asked.
>
> "Well ma'am, shortly after becoming an American, I was attacked by two fuckin' Arabs.

[kbsooner21]

I met a fairy today that would grant me one wish.
"I want to live forever," I said. "Sorry" said the fairy, "I'm not allowed to grant wishes like that!"

"Fine," I said, "I want to die after the Democrats get their heads out of their asses!"
"You crafty bastard," said the fairy.

[vols fan]